The Empty Spot Under the Table: Surviving Your First Thanksgiving Without Them

They say Thanksgiving is about gratitude, but this year, it feels more like an endurance test. If you are dreading tomorrow because it’s your first holiday without your best friend, I want you to know: you aren't alone, and your grief is valid.

For years, Thanksgiving had a rhythm. The sound of paws clicking on the kitchen tile while you cooked. The watchful eyes waiting for a piece of turkey to "accidentally" fall. The post-dinner nap where they curled up at your feet while the football game played on TV.

Tomorrow, the house might feel a little too quiet. You might instinctively reach down to sneak a piece of ham to a dog that isn't there. You might feel a lump in your throat when family members ask, "Where's Cashie?"

It’s okay to feel that sting. It’s okay if you need to step into the bathroom and cry for five minutes while everyone else is laughing. You aren't being "dramatic." You are mourning a family member.

3 Ways to Get Through Tomorrow:

Acknowledge the Empty Spot: Don't pretend everything is normal. It’s okay to say, "I really miss him today."
Save a Plate (The Spirit Plate): It might sound silly, but put a tiny piece of turkey on a saucer and set it outside or near their ashes. It’s a physical way to include them in the ritual.
Exit Strategy: If the noise and the questions get too much, give yourself permission to leave early or take a walk. Your mental health comes first.

Be gentle with yourself tomorrow. The love they gave you is still at the table, even if they aren't.

Happy Thanksgiving, from my wounded heart to yours. 🍂